It's been a long time since i have posted.
Got so little going on in my life it became too stress for me to handle.
Yea... Kinda stupid right?
But yes... Once again at the brink of disaster.
Before i slept last night, i got overwhelmed by fear.
The fear of not being able to pass my modules, let alone do well in them.
Everytime i look at myself and ask myself, why can't i resist the temptation of playing?
Why can't i force myself to just put in a little more effort to study.
Yet every single time i ask myself why, i just cannot figure it out.
And then i remembered watching a movie on channel 5 the other day.
The movie - Nanny McPhee Returns.
In the movie, 5 naughty children learned to work together, learned to share, learned to be brave, and most of all, learn to have a little faith.
They are taught in 5 seperate lesson, and here they are.
To stop fighting. It means a lot of things.
Fighting with siblings, friends, classmates, people you do not like, and even war between country. All this kind of "activities" gives out negative energy. Perhaps even fighting with yourself. Yes that would suck. To have your brain telling yourself to play games instead of studying and then to have your heart going "you need to study god dammit!" And then the guilt of not having studied hard enough after an exam... All this... it has made me a very negative person.
After watching the movie, and then watching it again just yesterday made me think hard... I know i have to stop all this fighting with myself. And not only that, i cannot stand it when people fight with each other. As small as the matter is, once you start fighting, no one knows what will happen. Someone will always get hurt in a way or the other. Be it mentally or physically, it always leaves a mark behind, and no one would really know the impact it has on that person... One day, when everyone stops fighting, this world will definitely become a better place, a place where everyone is happy, a place where we all learn to smile.
Learning to share might be the hardest thing on Earth. No one can deny the fact that if you have the best you ever had, and then someone comes along and ask, "Hey can i borrow it for one day?" its usually hard to say, "Well okay." Yet learning to share is a fantastic feeling. Sharing with someone who doesn't have something, and then seeing a smile on their faces could be the best feeling on Earth. It just like helping someone out and then getting a "Thank You" in return. You will definitely feel better. Learning to share not only help yourself, but it helps others feel better as well.
Yea the world definitely need to learn to share. We may have all the resources we need to create the perfect home, the perfect conditions for ourselves to live in, but we can never be happy if we have no one to share it with. Happiness can never be bought no matter how rich one is, and one of the ways to make sure you're happy, and so are the people around you, is to make sure you share.
Working together. Gosh, i don't even need to say anything for this. In ANY organisation, without teamwork, you are literally planning to fail. Not working together simply means that you will never get anything done... It is that simple. Dont try working alone in the coporate world out there, because trust me, you will get eaten. Alive.
And then i asked myself, how does this help me? You see... if i cannot study alone, then maybe the problem is that i need to work with people. Study with people. People who can study. Maybe it'll help me... Although its already too late now, i'm just hoping that i will pull through and i will be able to make it this time so that i will still have the chance to try studying with my friends... I do not wanna be stuck alone out there.
To be brave, to be strong in everything you do. To not fear the dangers that looms ahead. To not fear every step that you take. To learn to bravely conquer all our greatest fears. That is being brave. Even if you meet with failure, instead of living in a dream that is bound to engulf you, stand up bravely and overcome your failures. Even if it means take a small step at a time, do it, because if you are brave enough to take that first small step, you will overcome all failures in your life.
I need to be brave, to fight for what i think is right. I need to fight for myself. I must make sure that i can study hard and fight my temptations bravely. I know it is painful, and its the same for all of us. To fight against something that we might not wanna do, to try to make sure that we can get it going. But facing it bravely is something we all have to do. If i were to fail, i know i will definitely break down and cry, yet if i allow myself to sink into a dream of my own, i will never recover from my failure. I choose to be brave, and to conquer my worst fears.
Nanny McPhee's last lesson, to have faith. It is one that i have always believed in. Yes. Whatever it is, no matter how bad the situation, have a little faith that things will turn out alright. Having faith push oneself on to do better. If you lose faith in life, you will definitely die a slow and painful death. Our body reacts with what we are thinking. Why do you think doctors always try to encourage their patients to be strong? It is obvious enough.
Believing that things will turn out right is the first step to success, as i have always said. If you don't believe you can do it, you wont be able to do anything right. You will lose all hope and not be able to push yourself further. Having faith is just as important as the rest of the 4 lessons. It is the most important thing in anyone's life. Dont ever, lose faith. I know that things will be better one day. So if you are in a load of shit now, just push on. One day everything will be fine :)
Thats all i have now.
Nanny McPhee Returns is definitely a very awesome movie that everyone should watch. If you haven watch it, please do, because it touched my heart. I'm sure it will touch yours too if you watch it.
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